Romantical Ramblings

Lauren O'Brien
January 27, 2011
HNRS 3:30 - 4:20
Letter about Rationality

Dear Josh,

Guess what! I've recently adopted rationality as a way of thinking. This means...(two pages later...)

Josh? I wish that I had dated before so that I wouldn’t be scared to go after you. Even though I shouldn’t because, one – you’re my teacher and I don’t think it’s aloud (remember that girl you showed off to your girlfriend? She was out of your class two years before you did anything), two – I don’t feel mature enough to be with you, which is sad, and I am definitely not as good as your long time ex-girlfriend, and I don’t know how to hang out with your friends three – I’m too insecure for ANY type of dating, I question everything and feel incompetent… four – you probably see me as a younger sister not a possible…friend…that’s a girl… five – I don’t feel smart enough for you UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I hate having a crush on you. I hate crushes in general. I wish I didn’t dream about you – not just dream but daydream and in those daydreams you reject me too, or are my brother, which is MESSED UP. I need help. JOSHY JOSH JOSH JOSH JOSHUA and now I’ve written you a letter about my feelings for you instead of rationality. You are my sunshine my only sunshine you make me happy when skies are gray you’ll never know dear how much I love you please don’t take my sunshine away! Ill always love you and make you happy if you will only say the same but if you leave me and love another you’ll regret it all some day you are my sunshine my only sunshine you make me happy when skies are gray you’ll never know dear how much I love you please don’t take my sunshine way. What would Jodi think? (Why do I care about what she’ll think? Why do I care about what anyone would think?) You have shattered all of my dreams. Should I pursue this? I want to but I know I shouldn’t. Plus I don’t even know if I want to? I feel sort of like the lady with the pet dog, but I’m not having an affair am I? Oh god, I would be the girl sleeping with the professor wouldn’t I? But you know, metaphorically and not the professor but the peer facilitator so it’s not as bad right? I just wrote a whole page to you in like less than five minutes, which is almost more than I’ve written to you about rationality, which took me like an hour. I should stop but now I can’t get my mind off of you and this and everything. Oh! Six – I think I’m too lazy for you. You’re a workaholic I’m a lazy student. I don’t want to do homework or my internship or even go out which is sort of a lie I wish my friends and I went out more because then I could meet more people and not feel so lazy. GODS! I hate how Emilee had to notice my infatuation with you! And say that you had it with me! No nononononono NO! ughhhhhhhh. I’m going to keep this so that I can go back over it some time and maybe even add to it. Oh! Seven – you’re like twenty-two or three, that’s like four or five years older than me! (Why did it take until number seven to mention that?) maybe it doesn’t even matter, I mean, that’s the age difference between mom and dad…, eight – do you even WANT to be in a relationship? I mean, you practically just got out of that (bazillion) years relationship so maybe you aren’t even looking for anyone. I don’t know. I’m confused. I’m cliché.

Now, on to how I’ll use rationality in regards to leadership….

Rivers, Creeks, and Streams of Consciousness

Let's take a little peak in to my head, shall we?

I want to start writing on this again, but more like short stories. I think I will. It'll be like fanfiction (yes, I read fanfiction) but on this so no one will read it, which is fine with me! okay, yes. That's what I'm going to do. I hope no one I know ever finds this, that would suck. I haven't written in so long that the people I have told or shown this to hopefully just won't remember...I just talked to Jessica Findley about blogs in general. She likes food blogs, I don't really, I mean, they CAN be interesting but I'm just not a food person, you know? Okay, i have to write my papers now before my bladder explodes because I'm NOT going up (and getting distracted) before I finish this paper on rationality.

End brain dump.

Differences of Opinion

Differences of opinion tend to turn calm conversations into heated debates. Whether it's where to eat, what you thought of a movie, or- dare I even say it- politics. It flusters people, and they jump to defend their beliefs. Whether they're right or wrong, it doesn't matter. "I think this, so I'm right! Why do you have to be so thick headed?"
Differences of opinion: They suck...and they are wonderful.

Without them, we would never argue because we'd have nothing to argue about. There would be world peace, or world hate (depending on what we all agree on). People would smile and say, "Yes, you're quite right. Red would look wonderful in the dinning room!"

Everything would work out perfectly, perfectly blandly, that is.

Without them, we would lose our individuality and become no more than opinionless and directionless beings set out on this earth...and for what? To eventually ascend to join some higher being, or merely regenerate and become earth once more? I don't know- what would we all decide? There would be no human progress. People would smile and say, "Yes, you're quite right. The world is flat!"

Differences of opinion- what a pain! But without them, where would we be?
Gone. That's where we'd be.

Anybody disagree?

Insecurities

I FEEL SO ACCEPTED! OR UNDERSTOOD I GUESS! this is a seriously freeing experience...ahhh I am not a freak! WOO!

<3 <3 <3
Lauren

Life's got wings, and it knows how to use 'em

I just got back from Houston where my family and I spent Thanksgiving with the Trinkles (a.k.a. - my second family) We had a blast and I hated coming home but what can you do? Life's moving on: I've got the expected yet still despised senior year homework, hashing out college stuff (scholarships). There's only three weeks til Christmas break, and only two til the much antisipated yet still horrifyingly unprepared Christmas Choir Concert. Then, after break only four weeks til next semester. Not long after that comes spring break and a mere three weeks later, I graduate. With graduation comes my grad party, and focusing on my job to rack up some much needed moola. Then college, and then.....the rest of this very short experience most commonly known as "life".

Life's flying by, and I'm barely hanging on...

My New Obsession

Baby hair is the most delicate thing in the world. It just is. Just the sight of it screams FRAGILE, and when you touch it, forget about it! you'll never take your hand away. It's so pure and soft. And don't forget that it always smells good, like baby. I love it.

Baby hair is my new favorite.

Lauren

Julia's Child?

Hi everyone!

I just wanted to let you know that I've started a second blog called "Julia's Child?" in reference to the cook Julia Child. Don't get the reference? Don't worry you will in about ten seconds or as long as it takes you to read the next sentence or two depending on what I write. (man, I'm spazzy right now!) Okay, back to what I was saying. I've started this other blog as the basis for my AP English I-search project. The topic is: TEACHING MYSELF HOW TO COOK!

Do you get it now? NO? Well, how about this, it's a pun using my cooking idols name: could I be her child prodigy in cooking?

Well, that's what I plan to find out! If you like this blog, PLEASE check out Julia's Child? I need feed back for a grade!! Thanks all!

Lauren

PS ~ This also means I'm going to be on Blogger(well, not this blog specifically) a lot more often, FOR A GRADE! How cool is that? I love AP English, even though it is aging me ten years every week...)